You don’t need the same number of chocolate chip and oatmeal-raisin cookies, ever

I was at a conference the other day, and mid-afternoon, they brought in a tray of cookies with a long row of chocolate chip cookies and about the same number of oatmeal-raisin cookies.

When the break was over, there weren’t any chocolate chip cookies, but there were still plenty of oatmeal-raisin cookies.

This is because no one likes oatmeal-raisin cookies. OK, some people like oatmeal-raisin cookies, but, given a choice, most people would pick something else.

Cookie trays don’t lie.

You’d think meeting planners would notice this, too, but, as a group, they’re oblivious to the fact chocolate chip cookies go a lot faster than the oatmeal-raisins.

Putting an equal number of chocolate chip and oatmeal-raisin cookies on a tray is like leaving the tails on shrimp when you’re putting them in a pasta dish. It’s something everyone does, but shouldn’t, because it’s stupid.

(No one’s going to grab a shrimp from the shrimp fra diavolo. They’re going to spear it with a fork, along with a twirl of noodles and sauce.)

I’m not sure how we can stop the madness, but I have an idea.

If you’re at a conference or church social or a PTA meeting, and someone brings in a cookie try with an equal number of chocolate chip and oatmeal-raisin cookies, say this:

“THAT’S JUST STUPID. YOU KNOW THOSE OATMEAL-RAISIN COOKIES ARE JUST GOING TO SIT THERE, RIGHT? DO YOU REALLY HAVE ENOUGH MONEY IN YOUR BUDGET TO BUY COOKIES NO ONE’S GOING TO EAT?”

Hopefully, eventually, people will get the message.

40 thoughts on “You don’t need the same number of chocolate chip and oatmeal-raisin cookies, ever

  1. The key line here “most people would pick something else.” Sure oatmeal raisin cookies taste good when that’s all you have, but I’d choose the chocolate chip any day… or a good peanut butter cookie.

    1. This is purely anecdotal, but based on what I’ve seen, if you have chocolate chip, peanut butter, macadamia nut and oatmeal-raisin cookies on the tray, when the meeting’s over, all of the chocolate chip cookies will be gone, most of the peanut butter and macadamia cookies will be gone, but there’ll be plenty of oatmeal-raisin.

  2. Do NOT dare me, because I will be the girl who yells that, if only to embarrass my sister, because I LIVE to embarrass my sister. I say replace the oatmeal raising with white chocolate macadamia or those mini brownies.

  3. A good oatmeal-raisin cookie is a spiritual experience. But hardly anybody makes good oatmeal-raisin cookies. Most of the ones out there are scanty and on the dry side.

    1. The same’s true of fruitcake. People make jokes about fruitcake, but a good fruitcake is freakin’ awesome. It’s just that most people haven’t had good fruitcake. FYI, the Trappist months at the Abbey of Gethsemani in Kentucky make really good fruitcake. (Gethseminai is where Thomas Merton lived.)

      1. Ah yes, Gethsemani. I’m friends with someone for whom Thomas Merton is an uncle or great-uncle or something like that, and she keeps trying to talk me into taking a retreat there. If I ever go, I’ll be sure to look for the fruitcake.

  4. You should have been in charge of ordering pizza at my house growing up. Everyone wanted pepperoni except my mom who insisted we get something more interesting. We would get one pepperoni and one veggie with anchovies. All the pepperoni would disappear in an instant and my mom would have one piece of the bad pizza and the other seven pieces would go uneaten while we kids remained hungry. This pattern continued for years and years.

  5. That’s hilarious about the budget! They should be ashamed, really.

    And that’s something I always wondered, too – why DO they leave the tail on? I paid for you to make this meal for me! Why should I have to put my fingers in there and pull off those little tails? Answer me that. I should be spending my time eating and saying, “Yum, this is good.” I should not spend part of my meal feeling self-conscious because my hands are in my plate picking apart my food.

    1. I THINK it’s because they think it’s pretty, but it’s really a hassle and shows that whoever’s running the kitchen isn’t putting a lot of thought into the food.

  6. This would be hilarious if it weren’t so true. Every conference I’ve been to recently has had trays of disappearing chocolate chip cookies next to fully laden trays of oatmeal raisin ones. When will they learn?

    1. They won’t, because meeting planners LOVE oatmeal-raisin cookies, and they do this on purpose so they can take the leftovers home. I can’t prove this is true.

  7. I recently went to a training that only had oatmeal-raisin cookies. I admit to being pretty disappointed. I ate one, but I would have much rather had a chocolate chip cookie or even a snickerdoodle/sugar cookie.
    Great observation though… the minute I started reading it I started to smile.

    1. Having only oatmeal-raisin sounds like a trick for making a few cookies go a long way. People tend to grab an extra chocolate chip. I’m not sure that happens with oatmeal-raisin.

  8. I actually prefer an oatmeal raisin and, thus, I never have to worry about my favorite cookie being eaten all up before I can get to the tray. But, I agree that I am in the minority and if ever put in the position to order a cookie tray for a group of people, will make sure that the ratio of chocolate chip to oatmeal raisin is at least 4 to 1.

  9. That is clearly a strategy designed to curb consumption of cookies without appearing to be stingy. Those who are desperate for a cookie can eat the oatmeal raisin one, those who aren’t, don’t, and it looks as if the meeting planner has ordered more than enough.

  10. I feel that one of the reasons this occurs is that oatmeal raisin just doesn’t seem as sexy as the chocolate chip. I actually enjoy oatmeal raisin cookies once I am eating them, but it’s getting past the initial conception of oatmeal raisin being boring and dry that is the problem. And I agree with the above comment that a really good oatmeal raisin cookie is heaven, but usually you don’t get to experience that.

    Also, the tails on thing reminds me of a time my mom made this past dih for my birthday with a recipe she had gotten from a friend. We tried to tell her you are supposed to take the tails off but she was insistant that the recipe called for leaving them on. We humored her and just sat there with our fingers covered in sauce, rooting through the pasta to take off the tails, trying not to hurt her feelings. By the end of the meal, after about a half hour of continuously defending her reasoning, she finally sheepishly admitted that maybe she should have taken the tails off. Ha!

  11. Oatmeal Raisin cookies exist so that those on a diet can pretend that they are having a “healthy cookie” It has oatmeal, which is good for your heart and cholesterol, and it has raisins which are full of fiber. Therefore they are the “healthy” alternative to chocolate chip.

    Actually, I do really like oatmeal raisin, but given the choice, I would choose chocolate chip every time.

    1. According to the Internet, a chocolate chip cookie has 196 calories, while an oatmeal cookie has 113, but, really, eating an oatmeal-raisin cookie because it’s “healthy” is like going to Sizzler and getting a Diet Coke. I mean, let’s be honest. It’s not going to make a big difference.

  12. Now I know why I’m considered the social outcast. Yes, I protest on behalf of the sensual experience of a truly well-baked oatmeal raisin cookie – the kind with moist raisins where you can actually bite the whole oat. But fruitcake? Never.

  13. FIRST TIME VISITOR! Nice to meet ya…(subscribing today)

    I’d eat oatmeal raisin, if there was nothing else. However, if I had found out there were Chocolate chip, I’d be irritated they were all gone. In my opinion, that IS lame! I used to be an office manager and would consider that definitely when planning a platter.

    Although, when I take the kiddos to McDonalds and they have that (3) cookies for a dollar, I’m always surprised when one of the kids chooses the SUGAR COOKIE and not Chocolate chip. Then again, my daughter doesn’t care for chocolate too much. But plain ol’ sugar cookie? Really?

    Hope to see you on my board sometime soon!

    Sandi
    http://www.ahhsome.wordpress.com
    Lake Forest, CA
    ** Monday’s weigh in- down 14lbs in 3 weeks! Wahoo!

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